I started a new job this week. Surrounded by strangers, I initially felt quite vulnerable and a little cautious as I observed and listened to conversations around me. I was trying to figure out how I was going to fit in.
Before I really had the opportunity to engage with anybody, I dipped my toe into the pool of self-judgement. I asked myself, “Will my colleagues accept me? Will they be dismissive? Will they make false assumptions about my capabilities due to my belief systems?”
I felt the temptation to “rip the bandaid off” and declare all that was different about me so they could be forewarned about what they are in for. Likewise, I was ready to stand bold against perceived judgements. As I confided in my journal, the words flowed out my pen, “all will be organically revealed when the time is right.”
A little later in the week I found out that “the right time” had actually already occurred without me even realising. Before my first day had arrived, my boss had googled me. She discovered The Peacock Dreaming Blog, and liked what she saw. Apparently the link was subsequently shared with members of my new team. My secret was out!
No Need For Fight Or Flight
What I learnt this week is that within my current reality there is only connection and acceptance of me as I am. I feel welcomed and furthermore, I discovered I will be comfortable with just being. How awesome and refreshing is that!
It occurs to me though how much time and energy I have squandered in the past worrying about how I will be perceived and accepted by others. A part of me has long held the belief that if I get in first and judge me for my differences then other people’s circumspections wont hit so hard.
This sort of psychological self-abuse is crazy, right? And yet, I am not alone.
So many of us build things up in our minds in preparation for confrontation. We mentally rehearse what we are going to say and how we are going to respond. We put up barriers that prevent vulnerable, heart-felt connection. However more often than not, those worst case scenarios we envisage never eventuate. We are left bereft and emotionally exhausted, in need of deep recovery for no reason at all. What a waste of energy!
Attracting More of What Feeds Your Soul
The last couple of years for me has been about having the courage to stand in my power and own my uniqueness. The key learnings have been about feeling comfortable in my own skin and with who I am and what I have to offer the world.
What I am quickly realising is that when we honour ourselves, we attract more affirming experiences. We also attract into our midst a colourful, enriching array of individuals who have a wonderfully unique way of viewing the world around them. In turn, there is great appreciation and gratitude for their presence in our lives and all it contributes. You see, with such a diverse array of minds and abilities there is a vast selection of solutions and creative talents. You realise absolutely anything is possible.
Furthermore, when you stand in your truth and just be, unsolicited opportunities for further growth also find you. The big exciting snowball of resonance and growth just keeps building.
I can’t wait to see what is in store this year. If the first week is anything to go by, there is going to be an abundance of magic taking place.
Feature photos courtesy of Pixabay